Wonders of Witnessing Acts of Kindness

I always feel a smile come across my lips or a warm feeling that prompts me to touch my heart when I am lucky enough to be in the vicinity of an exchange of heartfelt generosity. What I am thrilled to find out is how exponentially powerful witnessing acts of kindness are.

A study performed at Harvard University and the University of California at San Diego showed that a single act of kindness can extend as far as three degrees of separation and also spreads laterally to affect a greater number of people than were originally present.

The people watching a loving exchange are affected and their positive experience prompts them to pay that kindness and generosity forward and beyond. As the giver you are in essence helping others who were not originally involved and this creates a cascade of kindness.

The commitment to embody the love we truly are has astounding affects on all we touch and all they touch. It takes only a handful of individuals to open their hearts and really make a difference. Ok you have all the scientific evidence you need (from Harvard no less), now go start a cascade of kindness.

I'd love to hear your experience of witnessing an act of kindness and its affect on you right afterwards and throughout your day.

With love and light,
Amber

Takin' It to the Street

I am very appreciative of the wonderful fruit and vegetable stands all over New York where fresh produce is so readily available. I think of these lovely vendors more as the cold weather sets in. I wonder how they can stand outside all day and often into the evening.

I passed by one of the local stands which I frequent and asked the man (Reminds me to get his name next time:) how he was doing in the cold. I mentioned that maybe I'll bring him some coffee next time. I asked him how he liked his coffee and made a mental note. I knew that I would follow through yet am guessing the man thought I was just making conversation.

A few days later, I had the thought to get the coffee on my way to the subway. I gave it to the man and he seemed appreciative. I left and went about my day happy that I could enhance someone elses.

I needed to get some veggies that night and went back to the stand. I checked in with myself on my intention for going to that veggie stand as there were others on my way home. I wanted to make sure that my intention was pure and that I wasn’t going there specifically to receive praise for my kindness. I felt fine if he didn’t even mention it so was sure that I was unattached to his response. Yes, the man did mention how much he appreciated the coffee which again shows me how much people need to be uplifted.

I bring up this intention question as I personally know what it’s like to feel so bad about myself that I did things for the sole purpose of proving to myself and the world that I was a decent human being. I was also very familiar with seeking crumbs of acknowledgement wherever they were thrown. I am deeply grateful to have moved far from that painful reality.

3 questions to ask yourself when doing something nice for another person:
1. Would I do it if the kindness recipient didn't show me any outward appreciation?
2. Am I expecting anything in return for my kindness?
3. Would I do this if I couldn't tell anyone what I did?

I believe that the best way to practice an unselfish act (to make sure that ego gratification is not your motivation) is to do it anonymously. What I mean by this is to do something nice to someone who is not present yet will receive the benefit of your kindness in the near future. The importance here is that your ego is not being stroked by the praise and appreciation of another.

Some good examples are: picking up trash from the sidewalk or in a public bathroom or picking up items that fell off the grocery store shelf with the intent to create a better environment for those to come. Also great is to leave a note on a stranger's door (or better yet add some flowers) wishing them a glorious day.

The next best option is to do something nice for a stranger who will probably acknowledge you yet you are likely less attached to receiving their approval than you are with those you have ongoing relationships with. There is also no way you can earn brownie points or expect something back from them in the future.

Some good examples are: opening the door for someone, giving up your seat on the subway (look for a future post on the benefit of witnessing kind acts) and wishing someone a nice day.

KINDNESS KREATION: Perform one anonymous unselfish act a day for the next 3 days. Then perform one unselfish act towards a stranger a day for the 3 days after that. Post comments on how it feels to perform each. Was there any differences? Can you now give to people you know and love in a more unselfish way?

Please remember that a small gesture on your part could impact someone's view on the world from "All people are unfriendly" to "There is one nice person in the world." That shift may seem small to you yet it could be miraculous and life-changing for that person.

With love and light,
Amber

An Avalanche of Abundance Awaits You

Yeah my first blog post. This has been a long time coming. I am both excited and scared at being so open, transparent and vulnerable. Sharing who I truly am with the world in such an official fashion is something I have been resisting for years. I purchased the URL for the Kindness Karousel in mid-2008 and I let the domain name expire the next year without having typed a single word.

No more hiding or pretending that I don't know who I truly am. Now is clearly the time to step forth as a force of love and light in the world.

I wrote the wisdom nugget below a number of years ago and it feels relevant as I write my first blog post. It came to me after I saw an image of all that my heart could desire on the other side of a closed door.

"An avalanche of abundance is awaiting me behind the door I'm most afraid to open."

I wondered how I could unlock that door and watch all the goodies flow in. The answer I got was that FEAR (False Evidence Appearing Real) barricaded the door shut. I knew that my task was to face my greatest fears so that I could unleash the power that would unlock the door and more importantly lead me back to myself.

I have done a very effective (yet painful) job of hiding my soul's passion and purpose behind fear and its many manifestations: addictions, anger, judgment, isolating, resisting change etc... I am living proof that what you resist persists.

I am fully confident that merely taking a small action like writing this post will move me in the direction of more fully embracing a life where I radiate love and light NO MATTER WHAT is happening within me or in the world around me.

Ok, so I faced the fear and will now push publish for the first time. Creak, creak, creak. I just heard my door inching open. I can already feel more peace flowing in. And other posts forming in my mind. (Stay tuned for a post on spiraling down fears to see how pesky our brains can be at believing the absurd).

How wonderful and immediate we can see changes in the outside world when we make internal shifts. The shifts don't need to be large yet the intention needs to be pure.

What's on the other side of your door? Are you ready to face the fears that have been chasing you for years? What small change can you make today that will set the avalanche in motion?

Your comments are enthusiastically encouraged and welcomed. Your experience will undoubtedly inspire and/or help someone else. And isn't that the whole point of living and co-creating alongside our fellow humans?

In love and light,
Amber